An imaginary conversation about being eaten by an alligator

I bet if I came up with some good click bait titles, my blog would get a lot more views. 

Like what?

Oh, you know, something like “and you will never believe what happens next!”

Or maybe “I tried that one weird old trick to burn belly fat, and it worked.”

Exactly. 

Do people really click on that stuff?

I hope my friends don’t!

We don’t. 

Maybe I could try something about fluffy kitties. Everyone likes fluffy kitties. 

Or puppies. Puppies are popular. 

I’m not sure how much I have to say about fluffy kitties and puppies…but I guess all I really need are good titles. 

People seem to like firefighters. 

Dalmatian puppy rescues squad of sleeping firefighters!

He could be wearing a fire hat. 

Exactly. And a hunky firefighter could be holding him. 

In front of the fire engine. 

Right. It would appeal to everyone. 

Then what?

Yeah. There are only so many times I can use firefighters and puppies. 

I dunno…there’s a reason it’s a classic. 

Focusing on baby animals seems a little limiting. 

Why are you thinking about increasing your readership?

Oh, I’m not really. 

No?

Well, I am thinking about it, but not in a serious way. 

Why not?

Because then I would have to do things like actually thinking about content. 

Don’t you already do that?

Not much lately. 

Really?

I think about it, and then don’t write it. 

Because…?

Sore arm, partly. Other things to do. Partly. Other priorities, I guess. 

Other people.

That, too. 

Is it problem?

What?

Not writing. 

I worry that writing less will mean I am thinking less. 

You probably don’t need to worry too much about that. 

Maybe it means I am losing my creativity. 

Seriously?  

Not my creativity, I guess, but my focus. 

Is it a problem? Does it bother you?

A little. 

You’ll do what is important to you when you need to do it. 

That’s true enough. 

What about alligators?

Alligators?

People always like a good story about alligators. 

I don’t know any alligators?

Uh, what?

Aren’t you supposed to write about what you know?

Make something up. Isn’t that what you do?

Oh. Yeah. Fiction. 

Maybe your angel could be attacked by alligators from Hell. 

From Hell? Aren’t the ones in Florida bad enough?

Maybe a puppy could rescue a bunch of firefighters from an alligator!

Maybe I should think of some ideas of my own…

Probably a good idea. 

Thanks. 

Lop eared bunnies riding elephants?

You aren’t helping. 

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