How do you feel about cats?
Cats? You know how I feel about cats. I hate cats.
Hate is such a strong word.
What did you do?
Do? What do you mean what did I do?
Did you get a fucking cat?
I don’t think a cat would be fucking, necessarily. I mean, one cat? It wouldn’t even be possible for it to..
Did you get a non-fucking cat?
Why would I get a cat? You hate cats.
I’m starting to hate you, too.
Are not. You love me. It doesn’t matter what I do. You can’t help it. Even if I bought a cat, you’d love me. An expensive cat. A fancy Dijon cat. Why are you pretending to bang your head against the wall?
I do. That’s one of the reasons you love me.
Incorrigible, you are.
I really am.
What cat? There is no cat, Neo.
But if there was a cat, rhetorically speaking…a black one, with a white Hitler mustache. How would you feel about it?
Bad. I would feel bad.
Why would you feel bad about a rhetorical cat?
None of this even has a point, does it?
Why do you look so discouraged? You keep saying I should talk more. I’m practicing.
To other people. You should talk more to other people.
Other people don’t understand when I talk about imaginary cats.
See? You do understand me!
I…oh, God. I did understand that. And stop smiling.
It makes me happy when people understand me. When I’m happy, I smile. You like it when I’m happy, don’t you?
I didn’t get a cat.
That’s a relief.
I got 2 pairs of shoes instead. Red ones.
Of course you did, because you couldn’t get a cat.
No one understands me like you do, baby.
What did you get me?
Vodka, a bag of grapefruit, and a very nice pair of argyle socks. I accidentally turned all of the grapefruit into juice, so we should probably start drinking it right away. It’s practically an emergency.
You understand me pretty well, too.
You wouldn’t have looked nearly this happy if I’d gotten a cat.
I’d still be pretty happy.
Because I’d still have bought you the vodka. Probably an even better one…
We’ll go with that.
I knew what you meant, George.
I know you did, baby.