Getting a splinter out


I could easily forgive his pride, if he had not mortified mine.

–Jane Austen/Pride And Prejudice



Slide the weight from your shoulders and move forward. You are afraid you might forget, but you never will. You will forgive and remember.

–Barbara Kingsolver/The Poisonwood Bible


On the first day of our vacation, I got a huge splinter in my index finger. Right under my fingernail. Yeah. Ouch. It was a big jagged hunk of wood, and it stabbed in about halfway into my nail. It pulled out easily (ewwww) and bled copiously (ewww) and hurt like a sombitch. I figured it would be better in a day or two.

It wasn’t.

It wasn’t terrible, but it hurt in that constantly irritating throbbing sort of way. It  looked fine, aside from the blood blister under the nail, but it  hurt. More than it seemed like it should. It still hurt when we got home a week later.  Then the blood blister rose to the top and all the skin came off the top of my finger along with it. The other thing that came out along with the skin was a quarter inch sliver of wood that had been in my finger the whole time.

A few hours later, my finger was almost completely pain free.


I think emotional hurt and forgiveness also  work something like that.

An emotional or spiritual injury might leave a  sliver of hurt in you. Until you can bring it to the surface and remove it, it will always hurt. It might not keep you from getting on with your life, but it’s a kind of a nagging pain that keeps you from being completely well as a person.

For a long time, I thought there were some things that are unforgivable. I’m not so sure about that now. Maybe you can let go of something and forgive without accepting it in your life anymore. Just because you forgive an abuser, you do not have to continue to accept abuse. It doesn’t mean you necessarily trust someone untrustworthy. It means you let go of it. You don’t use your energy on hating. You stop hitting back, either at yourself or the person who hurt you.

Not that it’s easy. Especially if the sliver is still inside of you.

Before anything can heal, the emotional splinter has to be found and removed.

Just like a physical one.

You remove the splinter, and there’s immediately less pain.

When there’s less pain, you can forgive.

With love and thanks to anyone who has provided tweezers when needed.

And beer.







I feel like a girl with a problem…


I won’t get any older, now the angels wanna wear my red shoes.

–Elvis Costello/Angels Wanna Wear My Red Shoes


I have over 12 pairs of red shoes. I stopped counting at 12.

Does that seem like a lot? It seems to me that I should have some more.


No angels have ever asked to wear them. Do you think Elvis made it up?

Some of them are pretty cute. I can understand why an angel would want to wear them. Popes have been wearing red shoes for years. Why should they have all the fun? Maybe angels gave them the idea, but then again, some of the recent red shoe popes got pretty old. Maybe they should have let the angels wear them after all.

The current pope doesn’t appear to be wearing the traditional red guccis. We’ll see if he ages at an decreased rate compared to other popes.

I will definitely consider it if an angel asks.


I wouldn’t have to let them wear all of my red shoes, would I, ’cause no one is wearing my red Frye boots but me!




Is there anything better than friends? No. No, there isn’t.

Making friends for the world to see
Let the people know you got what you need
With a friend at hand you will see the light
If your friends are there then every thing’s all right

–Elton John/Friends


Let’s just get this right there out in the front: Chelle and Rick are wonderful.

There.I said it.

They are.

For those of you who don’t know them, they are people I’ve known since I was in Junior High (Rick) and High School (Chelle). Apparently, I was on Student Council with Chelle. There is photographic evidence to support this, though neither of us actually remembers it. It’s in the year book, so it must be true.

We were not good friends at the time, but have gotten to know each other in the last several years. They are great people.


They moved into our neighborhood today. 1.33 miles away, Google says.

Only 1.33 miles!

We went over with a pizza and the mobile bar cart to help them settle in tonight, and OH MY GOD. They have the best deck in Tigard. We sat on the deck and drank a bottle of whisky and some beers, and smoked some cigars and talked.


We did not manage to do any unpacking. Uh. Oops. But we did get the bottle finished, so that counts as an accomplishment, right?

We also watched the moon rise and go from the East almost all the way to the West. Watching the moon is surely important.


Good times.


Looking forward to more of those good times.


Welcome to the neighborhood, Ginger and Stuff,

We love you.


Unpack before the Virginia game. We are SO having the away tailgater at your house!!!







Wild Turkey on the loose