Should I accept that I am someone who obsesses over things or try to change it?<\/p>\n
That’s quite a launching point for a chat.<\/p>\n
Sorry. Hi. How are you?<\/p>\n
Good thanks. You?<\/p>\n
Obsessing. You?<\/p>\n
Shaking my head. Thanks for asking.<\/p>\n
You’re welcome.<\/p>\n
You’re weird.<\/p>\n
No shit.<\/p>\n
What are you obsessing about today, anyway?<\/p>\n
No one, nothing in particular<\/p>\n
I am not sure I believe that–why are you bringing up the topic then?<\/p>\n
I am wondering where the line is between an obsession being harmless distraction and self-sabotage.<\/p>\n
So you’re obsessing about whether obsessing is automatically a bad thing.<\/p>\n
Yes. And if, by extension, I should try to eliminate the behavior like I would if it was something like excessive masturbation or alcohoolism.<\/p>\n
I’m not even sure where to start with that.<\/p>\n
Just pretend I didn’t bring up masturbation.<\/p>\n
What are your preliminary findings?<\/p>\n
Probably not, but it’s risky.<\/p>\n
You probably shouldn’t masturbate excessively?<\/p>\n
I told you just to pretend I didn’t mention that.<\/p>\n
You think that your obsessiveness might be a bad habit that you should correct.<\/p>\n
Right. Maybe. Except that it launches me into thoughts and creative directions that I like. And for the record, I do not masturbate excessively.<\/p>\n
What is excessively?<\/p>\n
More than I do.<\/p>\n
Of course. So what are the pros and cons?<\/p>\n
Of\u00a0 excessive masturbation?<\/p>\n
Right. No! Of obsessing about things!<\/p>\n
It gets me to really focus on something deeply. Which is great, since I tend to be terrible at concentrating.<\/p>\n
But?<\/p>\n
But it’s usually not on whatever task I might really need to be working on.<\/p>\n
For instance?<\/p>\n
For instance, I might spend a week revamping my blog instead of reading technical material for a certification exam at work.<\/p>\n
Not good.<\/p>\n
Or writing an imaginary conversation about excessive masturbation instead of doing laundry.<\/p>\n
Clean underwear is overrated.<\/p>\n
Hygiene is crucial, but maybe sometimes a person can go commando in an emergency.<\/p>\n
Well…<\/p>\n
My point, if I have one, is that is it really so bad to come up with imaginary conversations instead of cleaning?<\/p>\n
Not unless you stop cleaning entirely, and you always have a point.<\/p>\n
I do?<\/p>\n
Sometimes a sharp one.<\/p>\n
Huh. I thought I was rambling.<\/p>\n
You ramble with ulterior motives.<\/p>\n
What sort of ulterior motive could I possibly have for asking if I obsess about things too much?<\/p>\n
You could be trying to get me to tell you that you do.<\/p>\n
Why would I do that? It would take the fun out of obsessing about it myself. I mean, deciding for myself.<\/p>\n
Uh-huh.<\/p>\n
You’re very doubting.<\/p>\n
Maybe you want someone to absolve you of your weirdness.<\/p>\n
No one can do that.<\/p>\n
Not even me?<\/p>\n
Not even you. Especially not you.<\/p>\n
Why especially?<\/p>\n
Because you will barely even give me an opinion about things. Also, you are not weird at all.<\/p>\n
Yeah, well you always say “both” and “maybe” to everything. And while you do like to listen and discuss, you seldom take anyone’s advice.<\/p>\n
Perhaps…but I do like to hear the options.<\/p>\n
See?<\/p>\n
You aren’t very likable sometimes.<\/p>\n
More likable than you are.<\/p>\n
Really?<\/p>\n
Well, yes.<\/p>\n
Damn!<\/p>\n
Or maybe I am just more approachable to a variety of people.<\/p>\n
Is that a polite way of calling me an insane bitch?<\/p>\n
I would love to reply “yes” to that, but you’d kill me.<\/p>\n
No, but I might poke you gently with a fork. I’d miss you if you were dead.<\/p>\n
If you kill me, you mean.<\/p>\n
I’d miss you regardless of how you died.<\/p>\n
That’s…uh…<\/p>\n
Sweet.<\/p>\n
No, that’s not what I was going for..but sure. Sweet.<\/p>\n
I am, though.<\/p>\n
Yes, you are. Do you think maybe you could try a little harder to stay on task for things that are essential while still letting your mind wander when you don’t have important work to do?<\/p>\n
That’s awfully logical of you. And\u00a0 yes, I could try harder. I hardly try at all currently.<\/p>\n
You say that like it’s something horrible.<\/p>\n
No, just a little…I don’t know…<\/p>\n
Say it.<\/p>\n
Prosaic.<\/p>\n
I was expecting something worse.<\/p>\n
Soul killing?<\/p>\n
There we go.<\/p>\n
But it wouldn’t kill my soul.<\/p>\n
No, it wouldn’t.<\/p>\n
It would dent it a little.<\/p>\n
I thought you didn’t believe in souls.<\/p>\n
Not a literal soul. But sort of metaphorical one. The thing that makes a person who they are, not a literal thing that weighs 28 grams.<\/p>\n
Don’t you think that you’re quibbling?<\/p>\n
Don’t I always?<\/p>\n
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