{"id":1396,"date":"2013-09-10T06:13:01","date_gmt":"2013-09-10T13:13:01","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/michellejolin.com\/wordpress\/?p=1396"},"modified":"2013-09-09T22:10:45","modified_gmt":"2013-09-10T05:10:45","slug":"the-reassurance-of-the-bland","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=1396","title":{"rendered":"The reassurance of the bland"},"content":{"rendered":"

 <\/p>\n

Cool cherry cream, nice apple tart
\nI feel your taste all the time we’re apart
\nCoconut fudge really blows down those blues
\nBut you’ll have to have them all pulled out
\nAfter the Savoy truffle<\/p>\n

–The Beatles\/Savoy Truffle<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Mashed potatoes<\/p>\n

Top Ramen<\/p>\n

White rice and butter<\/p>\n

Pasta carbonara<\/p>\n

Popcorn<\/p>\n

Potato chips<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

There is something very comforting to me about things that are savory without being overly flavored. Don’t get me wrong–I am a big fan of spice in my food–but if I am eating because I’m depressed, there is a very good chance I will be eating something bland. And probably a lot of it.<\/p>\n

I shouldn’t eat when I’m depressed, it will only make me fat and more depressed. Shut the fuck up. I know that. If you’ve ever seen me, you can tell I have issues with eating– I’m fat. The fact that I overeat\u00a0 is apparent to anyone who cares to look in my direction. That’s not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about the inherent comfort of bland. Although someday we should talk about how much it sucks to have such a visible flaw. People who beat their children or cheat on their taxes don’t have to have it stamped on their foreheads.\u00a0 Just saying. (Sorry. Digression. Going back on track now)<\/p>\n

When I’m depressed, I relish anything that doesn’t require thought or analysis which can be consumed in large quantities.<\/p>\n

Not necessarily just food. It applies to all sorts of things. Reading. TV. Knitting.<\/p>\n

The last thing you want to do when you’re depressed is think. So I’ll sit and mindlessly eat a 20 gallon bucket of popcorn while re-reading “Pride and Prejudice” and\u00a0 “Betsy In Spite Of Herself” and watching “Real Housewives of New Jersey” marathons on Bravo channel.\u00a0 This is probably the place where I’m supposed to tell you how I figured out why I do it, and how I stopped. Sorry. I wish.<\/p>\n

\u00a0 I managed to replace bland food with running for quite a while, but apparently my joints didn’t think they wanted me to run 10 hours a week. They made me stop. I do get the same sort of zoned out feeling though. So I had the right idea. Perhaps I’ll find something else that works too.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

In case you’re wondering, writing doesn’t work because I can eat and type at the same time.<\/p>\n

I’m also working on\u00a0 a facile explanation of why I overeat the rest of the time, because let’s face it–I eat when I’m happy, when I’m tailgating, when I’m out with friends having a good time, when I’m celebrating or when I’m not even thinking about it. If I only overindulged on comfort food when I was depressed it wouldn’t be an issue. I’m not sad very often.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

And I eat all the time.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I hate to say it, but it’s a balance thing.<\/p>\n

An alcoholic has to stop drinking entirely.<\/p>\n

I can’t go cold turkey on food. I have to eat it in some sort of balance.<\/p>\n

Shrug.<\/p>\n

Or be fat.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

There are worse things to be. I’ve been quite a few of them, so I know.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Please pass the potatoes.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

BTW, even Facebook knows I’m fat:<\/p>\n

\"Damn<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

  Cool cherry cream, nice apple tart I feel your taste all the time we’re apart Coconut fudge really blows down those blues But you’ll have to have them all pulled out After the Savoy truffle –The Beatles\/Savoy Truffle     Mashed potatoes Top Ramen White rice and butter Pasta carbonara Popcorn Potato chips   … Continue reading The reassurance of the bland<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1431,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1396","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-words"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/09\/Screen-shot-2013-09-09-at-7.56.10-PM.png?fit=567%2C578&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p7lr3R-mw","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":1689,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=1689","url_meta":{"origin":1396,"position":0},"title":"What am I good at, anyway?","author":"Michelle","date":"September 27, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u00a0 Let me tell you a story cuz it's all I can do. --McKinley\/Citizen Kane \u00a0 Back in the late 90's, going through a bit of a rough patch, I started to realize that maybe there was something really wrong with me when I was complaining to a friend about\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Words"","block_context":{"text":"Words","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=7"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":6533,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=6533","url_meta":{"origin":1396,"position":1},"title":"Suicide is painless..","author":"Michelle","date":"July 6, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"There are many who dare not kill themselves for fear of what the neighbors will say. --Cyril Connolly First off, I feel like I have to say that although I have known several people who have committed suicide, I don't have anyone really close to me who has. 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