{"id":1544,"date":"2013-09-19T06:03:57","date_gmt":"2013-09-19T13:03:57","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/michellejolin.com\/wordpress\/?p=1544"},"modified":"2013-09-18T21:47:54","modified_gmt":"2013-09-19T04:47:54","slug":"allow-me-to-whine-for-just-a-moment-about-how-much-i-miss-singing","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=1544","title":{"rendered":"Allow me to whine for just a moment about singing"},"content":{"rendered":"

 <\/p>\n

My heart wants to sing every song it hears
\nMy heart wants to beat like the wings of the birds
\nThat rise from the lake to the trees<\/p>\n

O.Hammerstein\/The Sound Of Music<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/div>\n

It’s not like I’m an actual singer. I haven’t sung in public since High School. I have no real<\/em> need to sing on a daily basis. My livelihood is not impacted when I am unable to sing. No one even hears me sing, except my poor husband and the cat. Or people who have the misfortune to ride in my car when I forget I’m not alone and burst into song. (Sorry ’bout that)<\/p>\n

But you know what? I sing. I sing all the time. In the car, in the house when no one is here. Sitting at my desk. All the time. I can’t really help it. Sometimes at work, by accident. The songs just come out. If I don’t sing, I hum. It’s like smiling. I just do it. It’s me. And I haven’t been able to sing for a week because I have a cold, and singing makes me cough. I had to drive to Eugene and back without singing a single song. It just isn’t natural. I couldn’t even sing along with Bette Midler or Elton John, which is a sure sign that something is very wrong indeed.<\/p>\n

I feel like I’ve been someone else for a week. Someone gloomy. Someone with a song stuck in her throat. The not singing is almost as bad as the pseudo-heartsickness I was complaining about yesterday. In fact, maybe they’re related. Maybe my heart hurts not only because of the coughing causing physical pain in my chest but also because I’m not able to express my true self right now through singing which is causing me actual heartsickness.<\/p>\n

It could happen.<\/p>\n

Gah. It sounds like bullshit, right?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

But I think it’s what exactly what is happening.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I realize that it will not be the end of the world if I can’t sing for a few more days. My heart probably won’t stop beating.<\/p>\n

It won’t. <\/p>\n

Right?<\/p>\n

 
\n <\/p>\n

Keep your fingers crossed.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

  My heart wants to sing every song it hears My heart wants to beat like the wings of the birds That rise from the lake to the trees O.Hammerstein\/The Sound Of Music It’s not like I’m an actual singer. I haven’t sung in public since High School. I have no real need to sing … Continue reading Allow me to whine for just a moment about singing<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1544","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-words"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p7lr3R-oU","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":8563,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=8563","url_meta":{"origin":1544,"position":0},"title":"Singing in public","author":"Michelle","date":"December 11, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"The other night I was very early to a date with friends, so I decided to do a little Christmas shopping before heading to the bar. As I browsed through the store, the shopkeeper asked me what I was singing. \"Singing,\" I asked? \"Yes,\" she said. \"You were singing something,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Words"","block_context":{"text":"Words","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=7"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1477,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=1477","url_meta":{"origin":1544,"position":1},"title":"Just a song before I go","author":"Michelle","date":"September 14, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"1 2 3 Turn it up. --Lynyrd Skynyrd\/Sweet Home Alabama Music and cars. Between Summer road trips and football games, I spend a lot of time in the car this time of year. That means a lot of music. 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I\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Words"","block_context":{"text":"Words","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=7"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":10973,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=10973","url_meta":{"origin":1544,"position":3},"title":"Blog maintenance","author":"Michelle","date":"November 12, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"there's a bluebird in my heart that wants to get out but I pour whiskey on him and inhale cigarette smoke and the whores and the bartenders and the grocery clerks never know that he's in there. --Charles BukowskiA lot of times, I start posts which don't ever get finished.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Random thoughts"","block_context":{"text":"Random thoughts","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=20"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":758,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=758","url_meta":{"origin":1544,"position":4},"title":"Sad songs say so much","author":"Michelle","date":"August 7, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u00a0 I'm causing a mild sensation With this new occupation I'm permanently glued To this extraordinary mood so now move over Let me take over With my melancholy blues --Queen\/Melancholy Blues \u00a0 I was singing along with the iPod on my way home from work (as usual) and decided something:\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Music"","block_context":{"text":"Music","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=9"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1065,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=1065","url_meta":{"origin":1544,"position":5},"title":"Sometimes things are just a little too surreal around me when they are combined","author":"Michelle","date":"August 22, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u00a0 At the gym,\u00a0 there's always a lot going on. People walking and driving by in front of the gym, people working out, several TVs on, and like most folks doing cardio I listen to music. Set iTunes to shuffle and go. This afternoon I was trying not to sing\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Words"","block_context":{"text":"Words","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=7"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1544","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1544"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1544\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1544"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1544"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1544"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}