{"id":1631,"date":"2013-09-23T06:07:26","date_gmt":"2013-09-23T13:07:26","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/michellejolin.com\/wordpress\/?p=1631"},"modified":"2013-09-22T21:09:17","modified_gmt":"2013-09-23T04:09:17","slug":"what-makes-you-welcome","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=1631","title":{"rendered":"Where everybody knows your name"},"content":{"rendered":"

Once again…welcome to my house. Come freely. Go safely; and leave something of the happiness you bring.<\/p>\n

–Bram Stoker\/Dracula<\/p>\n

Home – is where I want to be
\nBut I guess I’m already there
\nI come home – -she lifted up her wings
\nGuess that this must be the place<\/p>\n

–Talking Heads\/This Must Be The Place<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

One of the most important parts of feeling welcome in a place is how you are greeted. There are a lot of other things that go into a continued feeling of welcome, but the greeting sets the tone. Having someone greet me with a name no one else uses always makes me feel special.<\/p>\n

When I was a little kid, the neighbor across the street would always greet me with “hey Chevelle, go on in the house and have a beer. ”\u00a0 Not a typical greeting from an adult to a 7 year old girl, perhaps, but it always made me feel like I was part of the family. No, they didn’t really let me have beer. He drove a Chevy Chevelle that he was always working on, and he loved that car, so I knew that if he called me Chevelle he must like me. He was kind of a big tough guy, so it made it less scary for me to be there. Things are very simple when you are 7.<\/p>\n

Another friend’s dad would always greet me with “Meeeshell!” and\u00a0 a big dopey smile when I came to their house. It always made me smile right back.\u00a0 I don’t know if it was the dopey grin or that he had his own personal name for me that made me feel so special. Both, I guess.<\/p>\n

Nicknames tend to make me feel like a person cares enough about me to think I deserve a name that’s just for me. Maybe it really just means they can’t remember my name at all.<\/p>\n

I choose to believe it’s the former.<\/p>\n

In addition to Chevelle and MeeeShell!, at various points in my life I’ve been called Shelly, Shellyshel, MJ, Jolin, Mici, Miche, Micia, Mici-elle, Mishishell, Mishelly, Michou, Michelle-ina, Michelina, Micetta and Michette. Until this very second, I had no idea I’d been called so many variants of my name. I don’t think of myself as a nickname person, but seeing this list is making me reconsider! Of course, Italians and French people are responsible for a lot of those names, and they’re sort of culturally prone to nicknames.<\/p>\n

Oddly, I’m not overly\u00a0 fond of normal terms of endearment. I don’t mind if friends call me sugar or sweetie, but I’m not thrilled about it from lovers. A guy I was dating used to call me “dear” and I made him stop because I kept thinking he’d forgotten my name. Which, in retrospect, could have easily been the case.\u00a0 Another exception for the Italians–they can call me tesoro or amore any time. Well, you know, if I’m ever single again.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Actually, you know what?<\/p>\n

If I’m single, and you’re a single Central\/Northern Italian, you can call me pretty much anything you want and I’ll feel very…welcome.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I\u00a0 might even bat my new false eyelashes at you.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Once again…welcome to my house. Come freely. Go safely; and leave something of the happiness you bring. –Bram Stoker\/Dracula Home – is where I want to be But I guess I’m already there I come home – -she lifted up her wings Guess that this must be the place –Talking Heads\/This Must Be The Place … Continue reading Where everybody knows your name<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1631","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-words"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p7lr3R-qj","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":5077,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=5077","url_meta":{"origin":1631,"position":0},"title":"Transformational butterfly voodoo bullshit","author":"Michelle","date":"May 18, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Caterpillar. Chrysalis. Butterfly Girl. Woman. Bitch. Crone. Catalyst. Change. Catharsis Or something. I was having an incompetent feeling day for no reason in particular. I did my job well enough. Did some writing that largely sucked appropriately enough for the subject matter. All day, though, this mass of depressing stupid\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Words"","block_context":{"text":"Words","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=7"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/04\/20140414-183214.jpg?fit=300%2C225&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":5584,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=5584","url_meta":{"origin":1631,"position":1},"title":"Out she goes","author":"Michelle","date":"May 6, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"It's Friday night and she is going out. Of course she is going out. She always goes out. She doesn't have a date, though. She never has dates. She has plans to meet a group of people. A group of men. She's one of the only girls who is a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Words"","block_context":{"text":"Words","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=7"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/05\/20140504-192537.jpg?fit=300%2C213&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":11561,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=11561","url_meta":{"origin":1631,"position":2},"title":"An imaginary conversation about not being ticklish","author":"Michelle","date":"April 29, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"I like it when you do that... It doesn't tickle? No, I'm not ticklish. Anywhere? No, when I was 8 years old or so, I decided not to be ticklish anymore. Is that even possible? Yep. I did it, so it must be possible. Is that a challenge? Not at\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Imaginary Conversation"","block_context":{"text":"Imaginary Conversation","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=18"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":7883,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=7883","url_meta":{"origin":1631,"position":3},"title":"And on the seventh day, there was cooking","author":"Michelle","date":"October 13, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Cooking and company today. Ashley arrived from Eugene and moved into the spare bedroom for...eh...who knows. Until she finds a place of her own. Or doesn't and stays. Or whatever. We'll see. Before she got here, there was much cooking. I do this periodically on a Sunday. Cook several different\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Words"","block_context":{"text":"Words","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=7"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":4853,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=4853","url_meta":{"origin":1631,"position":4},"title":"Personality tests","author":"Michelle","date":"April 6, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Have I ever confessed my deep love for taking personality tests? Does that mean I'm overly analytical? Should I think about it some more? The other day, I took an online verson of that Jungian inspired personality test that spits out the incomprehensible letters that determine who you are. Myers-Briggs.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Words"","block_context":{"text":"Words","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=7"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":5107,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=5107","url_meta":{"origin":1631,"position":5},"title":"A face to forget","author":"Michelle","date":"April 16, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"No matter which way you go No matter which way you stay You're out of my mind, out of my mind Out of my mind, out of my mind --Tegan and Sara\/Walking With A Ghost There are some people who are not particularly memorable. 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