{"id":2502,"date":"2013-11-15T06:10:16","date_gmt":"2013-11-15T14:10:16","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/michellejolin.com\/wordpress\/?p=2502"},"modified":"2013-11-15T07:49:09","modified_gmt":"2013-11-15T15:49:09","slug":"big-exit","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=2502","title":{"rendered":"Run, Forrest, run"},"content":{"rendered":"

I walk on concrete
\nI walk on sand
\nBut I can’t find a safe place to stand.
\nI’m scared, baby
\nI want to run
\nPJ Harvey\/Big Exit<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

It has been said that I am sometimes a little bit headstrong. <\/p>\n

Pause for laughter. <\/p>\n

OK. I am really freaking stubborn. I do not back down from many situations. I have even been kicked out of a club. For fighting. Stop laughing. I was too fighting. If you want details you will have to ask me in person….but I was once banned from a place for trying to strangle a guy. No, I didn’t succeed. I’m just saying I’m stubborn, and I don’t back down easily. I once kicked a guy physically out of my car for insulting my hair. That might not indicate that I was stubborn as much as it indicates that I have a bad disposition. <\/p>\n

I have been held up at gunpoint. I have been on fire. <\/p>\n

What makes me run?<\/p>\n

I will run away from anyone who stops talking to me. I will try once or twice to find out why, but if they remain elusive I will assume they are mad at me or they hate me, or that they don’t want me around, and I will run. Or, really, it’s more like a very slow walk backwards. <\/p>\n

Is that a productive way to confront issues? Not so much.<\/p>\n

But what am I going to do? They won’t talk to me..<\/p>\n

I guess in some ways, it’s another way to stand my ground. <\/p>\n

They know where to find me if they want to talk.
\nI can wait.
\nFor how long?<\/p>\n

As long as I need to.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I walk on concrete I walk on sand But I can’t find a safe place to stand. I’m scared, baby I want to run PJ Harvey\/Big Exit It has been said that I am sometimes a little bit headstrong. Pause for laughter. OK. I am really freaking stubborn. I do not back down from many … Continue reading Run, Forrest, run<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2502","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-words"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p7lr3R-Em","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":6675,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=6675","url_meta":{"origin":2502,"position":0},"title":"What is a quitter, anyway, and am I one?","author":"Michelle","date":"July 15, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"\"maybe you should try to quit\" \"Hey! Hey-I ain't no fuckin' quitter.\" --Coffee and Cigarettes Not a quitter? Well. Piano lessons? Flute? Bassoon? Quit Cross country team? Quit Arabic? Quit Russian? Quit Cigarettes? Quit. Well. Mostly. Belly dancing? Quit Running? Quit Spin class? Quit I don't typically quit something immediately.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Words"","block_context":{"text":"Words","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=7"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/07\/20140714-172049-62449285.jpg?fit=768%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/07\/20140714-172049-62449285.jpg?fit=768%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/07\/20140714-172049-62449285.jpg?fit=768%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/07\/20140714-172049-62449285.jpg?fit=768%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":4834,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=4834","url_meta":{"origin":2502,"position":1},"title":"Songs I will never sing to a child I will not have","author":"Michelle","date":"April 8, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"One of the many lists I've written over the years was a list of songs I would have sung to my child. Even though I didn't intend to have one. For a long time I carried it around, written longhand on a notepad, wherever I went. I went to quite\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Words"","block_context":{"text":"Words","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=7"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":9137,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=9137","url_meta":{"origin":2502,"position":2},"title":"Some people just know…","author":"Michelle","date":"January 31, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Every now and then the things I lean on lose their meaning and I find myself careening in places where I should not let me go. She has the power to go where no one else can find me and to silently remind me of the happiness and the good\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Words"","block_context":{"text":"Words","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=7"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/01\/IMG_9326-0.jpg?fit=900%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/01\/IMG_9326-0.jpg?fit=900%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/01\/IMG_9326-0.jpg?fit=900%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/01\/IMG_9326-0.jpg?fit=900%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":10577,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=10577","url_meta":{"origin":2502,"position":3},"title":"Being a Duck","author":"Michelle","date":"September 29, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"When I was in college, I didn't like football. \u00a0Traumatized by love gone wrong with a left-handed quarterback, I decided football fandom wasn't for me. Too much heart break. Besides, the Oregon football team had a long history of losing. I didn't need sports heartbreak too.\u00a0 Even though I wasn't\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Random thoughts"","block_context":{"text":"Random thoughts","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=20"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/09\/IMG_0622.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/09\/IMG_0622.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/09\/IMG_0622.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/09\/IMG_0622.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/09\/IMG_0622.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":2969,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=2969","url_meta":{"origin":2502,"position":4},"title":"Kissing a fool","author":"Michelle","date":"December 16, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"People You can never change the way they feel Better let them do just what they will For they will If you let them Steal your heart from you --George Michael\/Kissing A Fool There is a balance between making yourself vulnerable in a way that lets love into your life\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Words"","block_context":{"text":"Words","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=7"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":8170,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=8170","url_meta":{"origin":2502,"position":5},"title":"Big moments","author":"Michelle","date":"December 6, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Bottom line is, even if you see them coming, you're not ready for the big moments. No one asks for their life to change, not really. But it does. So, what are we, helpless? Puppets? Nah. The big moments are gonna come, you can't help that. It's what you do\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Words"","block_context":{"text":"Words","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=7"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2502","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2502"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2502\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2502"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2502"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2502"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}