My mind swirls around. Whorls, whirls
\nHurricane cyclone vortex
\nIdeas words imaginary conversations fall down to the bottom
\nAnd float into the whirl again <\/p>\n
Conversations that never happened
\nWish they had not
\nWish they would
\nHarsher words
\nKinder words
\nMore loving
\nMore hateful
\nMore tearful
\nMore forgiveness?<\/p>\n
What do you do when you aren’t talking to me?
\nI think of you.
\nYou do?
\nAll the time
\nNo you don’t.
\nNot really.
\nSo why did you say it?
\nTo make you happy. Why did you ask if you knew the answer?
\nBecause I didn’t. Not really. I’d like to think that I’m all you think about, but I’m not insane.
\nI do think of you. But
\nBut?
\nIt’s sexual.
\nIs that bad?
\nNot in my mind it isn’t.
\nIt’s OK in your mind, but not in person?
\nNo, it’s good in person too.
\nYou have ethical reservations about thinking about sex or having sex in real life?
\nNo.
\nSo, what’s the problem then?
\nI don’t know. I don’t let it bother me.
\nThat bothers me. Why can’t you let yourself be bothered?
\nI don’t know.
\nYou don’t try very hard to know.
\nAgreed.
\nThat worries me.
\nDon’t be.
\nNot worries, frustrates.
\nThanks.
\nI think you like that.
\nMaybe. Yes. <\/p>\n
What are you listening to?
\nAn Italian song. Listen…
\nNice. How’d you find out about them?
\nIn Italy.
\nIn Italy?
\nSure, a friend played them for me one day.
\nFriend?
\nYeah. He played them for me on the day we met.
\nHim?
\nHim.
\nJust a friend?
\nJust? Friends are important.
\nAgreed.
\nWhat? Why do you look so dubious?
\nIs he gay?
\nGay? No, why?
\nIf you’re friends. You didn’t fuck him?
\nWhat?
\nIt’s not a difficult question.
\nYou can’t you call someone a friend if you’ve fucked them?
\nNo.
\nNo?
\nNo.
\nWhy not?
\nBecause then you aren’t friends, you are lovers.
\nYou can’t be both?
\nNot with someone you want to fuck.
\nThat’s asinine.
\nNo. Realistic.
\nSo fuck buddies are a myth?
\nYes.
\nBullshit.<\/p>\n
Hey.
\nHey.
\nWhere are you?
\nIt’s 6 in the morning. Where do you think?
\nDid I wake you up?
\nOf course. It’s 6 in the morning.
\nCan you meet me?
\nRight now?
\nI’m at the bar down the street.
\nDoing what? They’re closed until lunch.
\nI have a few hours until my first meeting. Come and talk to me.
\nYou aren’t going to break up with me in the parking lot, are you?
\nWhat? No. What? Can you come?
\nSure. I’ll jump in the shower and be right there.
\nNo, now.
\nCan I brush my teeth?
\nYes. Brush your teeth. I know you won’t brush your hair.
\nI could just stay in bed.
\nHurry up.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"