{"id":4920,"date":"2014-04-14T05:30:38","date_gmt":"2014-04-14T12:30:38","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/michellejolin.com\/wordpress\/?p=4920"},"modified":"2014-04-13T17:48:30","modified_gmt":"2014-04-14T00:48:30","slug":"oh-expectations","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=4920","title":{"rendered":"Oh, expectations"},"content":{"rendered":"

Between a lover and a fighter
\nWith my pen and my electric typewriter
\nEven in a perfect world where everyone was equal
\nI’d still own the film rights and be working on the sequel
\n–Elvis Costello\/Every Day I Write The Book<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

One of the things that can get a what-iffer into trouble quickly is expectations. There’s not exactly a huge, gaping chasm between a daydream and an expectation. You’d think there might be, but no.<\/p>\n

You start out what-iffing your way through an imaginary conversation, or an imaginary scenario, and those daydreams you what-iffify start to solidify. Yes, solidify. In your mind. Yes, that is what I mean to say. Solid thoughts.<\/p>\n

Then your mind begins to think that those things exist. You expect them to happen. Maybe not consciously. Consciously, you know they’re just daydreams, wishes. Fictions. Unconsciously, though, they exist. I don’t know exactly how, but they do. <\/p>\n

There is nothing more disappointing than post-whatif sexual disappointment. Uh. I hear.<\/p>\n

On the other hand, when you wishHopeWhatIf something and it happens…
\nEven though there is no way it ever would? It makes you smile. All over. It’s a total surprise that isn’t a surprise at all. <\/p>\n

Which is great. Except. Except that now your wishing brain thinks that what-iffing is like predicting the future. It is disappointing to be disappointed about something not happening as you imagined it, when it never existed except as a what-if.<\/p>\n

A little imagination must be a great thing. A lot of imagination can be a challenge, especially combined with a penchant for drifting off into the ether. <\/p>\n

I do love a good stare off into space.<\/p>\n

Sorry, what were you saying?<\/p>\n

I was just wondering about…something.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Between a lover and a fighter With my pen and my electric typewriter Even in a perfect world where everyone was equal I’d still own the film rights and be working on the sequel –Elvis Costello\/Every Day I Write The Book One of the things that can get a what-iffer into trouble quickly is expectations. … Continue reading Oh, expectations<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":5053,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"oh, expectations http:\/\/wp.me\/p4FR8-1hm","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4920","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-words"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/04\/20140413-174814.jpg?fit=239%2C300&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p7lr3R-1hm","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":11042,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=11042","url_meta":{"origin":4920,"position":0},"title":"An imaginary conversation about vampires and consent.","author":"Michelle","date":"January 10, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Do you think it's possible to give consent if one of the people can glamor you into believing anything they want? What's our context here? Vampires. You'll have to refresh my memory -- I don't have your abiding love of all things fanged. In many traditions, vampires can gaze into\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Imaginary Conversation"","block_context":{"text":"Imaginary Conversation","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=18"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":7262,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=7262","url_meta":{"origin":4920,"position":1},"title":"An imaginary conversation about imaginary football boyfriends","author":"Michelle","date":"August 29, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"You know what? No. Do you want to? Sure. You don't sound very enthusiastic about it! Maybe I will warm up as the conversation progresses. No pressure. None. OK. So are you going to tell me? What? The thing you were starting to say. Right. What was it? Uh... It's\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Football"","block_context":{"text":"Football","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=17"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":8066,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=8066","url_meta":{"origin":4920,"position":2},"title":"Writing to a person\/voice","author":"Michelle","date":"October 30, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Writing is not life, but I think that sometimes it can be a way back to life. --Stephen King\/On Writing One of the bits of advice Stephen King likes to give aspiring writers is about voice: you should pick an audience to write to, preferably a particular person. I don't\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Words"","block_context":{"text":"Words","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=7"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":8301,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=8301","url_meta":{"origin":4920,"position":3},"title":"An imaginary conversation about seeing things differently","author":"Michelle","date":"November 24, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Don't you ever wonder about how we see things? Philosophically? No, literally. With our eyes? No. Well, yes. There are obviously scientific facts about things we see. Colors come from the way the light waves bounce or something like that, and those things are quantifiable, right? I guess. Science isn't\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Imaginary Conversation"","block_context":{"text":"Imaginary Conversation","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=18"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":9660,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=9660","url_meta":{"origin":4920,"position":4},"title":"An imaginary conversation about my writing","author":"Michelle","date":"March 31, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"You talk about writing a lot. Do you actually write as much as you talk about it?Ugh. Really? Am I awful and pretentious?Awful, yes. \u00a0Not pretentious.Fucker.\u00a0Heh.\u00a0It's not like I am writing the Great American Anything.\u00a0No?No. It's more like the Minor American Exercise In Mental Masturbation.\u00a0It can't be that bad!Oh, it's\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Imaginary Conversation"","block_context":{"text":"Imaginary Conversation","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=18"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":9632,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=9632","url_meta":{"origin":4920,"position":5},"title":"An imaginary conversation about not going out so much","author":"Michelle","date":"March 24, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"This time, I am really serious. I am going to spend two consecutive nights at home, except for going to the gym.You're going to the gym again?Shut up. I haven't gone yet, but I signed up yesterday. I was supposed to go tonight but then I went out instead.What was\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Imaginary Conversation"","block_context":{"text":"Imaginary Conversation","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=18"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4920","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=4920"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4920\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/5053"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=4920"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=4920"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=4920"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}