{"id":6016,"date":"2014-06-01T07:30:01","date_gmt":"2014-06-01T14:30:01","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/michellejolin.com\/wordpress\/?p=6016"},"modified":"2014-06-01T07:24:38","modified_gmt":"2014-06-01T14:24:38","slug":"being-naked-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=6016","title":{"rendered":"Being naked"},"content":{"rendered":"

\nWhat the people who don\u2019t wear shades don\u2019t know is that some of us wear shades because they\u2019re all that stop us being eye-naked \u2014 forced to gaze, unprotected, at the wet and bleeding face of reality as it squirms and pulses and writhes like a razor slicing a child\u2019s eyeball or the sight of something dead, twitching, just once before collapsing and bloating
\n–Neil Gaiman\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

It is not easy to be naked.<\/p>\n

In what way?<\/p>\n

In any way. Actually or just metaphorically.
\nEye-naked, naked souled or just plain physically nude.<\/p>\n

Having the gaze of others on your body, mind or soul is…trying for those of us who think about such things. Yes, the weirdos.<\/p>\n

And you know what? I take back what I said about being physically naked. That’s really not so difficult, depending on the situation. For the first time with a new lover? It’s a nervous feeling, but a good one. In front of a bunch of people who are all fully clothed? Maybe that wouldn’t be fun. Naked among other congenial naked folk, like at a beach or Burning Man? Not a problem at all, except for getting dirt and sand in inconvenient places and sunburn. Mentally, it’s much easier than being naked souled. Much, much easier.<\/p>\n

Showing people who you are, who you *really* are requires a lot of courage. A willingness to be vulnerable. A willingness to admit that you could be rejected, but you’re going to show your soul anyway. It’s an amazing feeling, but so hard to do. Especially if it’s ever blown up on you. There is nothing quite like letting someone see who you really are and having them grind their heel on it like a cigarette butt. It’s something you maybe don’t quite recover from. <\/p>\n

So then what? You just don’t do it again, right?<\/p>\n

Wrong. <\/p>\n

Well.
\nYes. You do stop doing it. You close yourself off. <\/p>\n

And what does it get you? Right. Nothing. <\/p>\n

It’s a difficult thing to wrap your mind around, but in order to get the kind of love you probably want? You have to be open to it you have to trust. You have to have faith. You have to be vulnerable. <\/p>\n

Or you won’t ever get it. <\/p>\n

I know, right?<\/p>\n

It does<\/em> suck. <\/p>\n

But it’s the only way.
\nI’ve tried everything else. Trust me, I know. <\/p>\n


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What the people who don\u2019t wear shades don\u2019t know is that some of us wear shades because they\u2019re all that stop us being eye-naked \u2014 forced to gaze, unprotected, at the wet and bleeding face of reality as it squirms and pulses and writhes like a razor slicing a child\u2019s eyeball or the sight of … Continue reading Being naked<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":6027,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6016","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-words"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/05\/20140531-234853-85733494.jpg?fit=454%2C313&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p7lr3R-1z2","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":5881,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=5881","url_meta":{"origin":6016,"position":0},"title":"An imaginary conversation about television","author":"Michelle","date":"May 25, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Hey..so...do you have any idea why there is a 100 foot wide television in the living room? 100 foot wide? That is pretty big for a 15 foot long wall! It's enormous. It's larger than the actual physical space. I am pretty sure it has disrupted the time\/space continuum in\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Imaginary Conversation"","block_context":{"text":"Imaginary Conversation","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=18"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/05\/20140524-171506-62106477.jpg?fit=454%2C313&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":10605,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=10605","url_meta":{"origin":6016,"position":1},"title":"An imaginary conversation about gray days","author":"Michelle","date":"October 5, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Some days I just really wonder. Wonder? About what? Everything. Everything? That is a lot to wonder about! It is! Why do you feel like that's your job? My job? I don't. I just do it recreationally. For fun. More of a calling, I suppose. Like the priesthood. But with\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Imaginary Conversation"","block_context":{"text":"Imaginary Conversation","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=18"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/01\/IMG_2470-0.jpg?fit=341%2C391&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":4581,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=4581","url_meta":{"origin":6016,"position":2},"title":"Being naked","author":"Michelle","date":"March 22, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"And I feel like I'm naked in front of the crowd Cause these words are my diary, screaming out loud And I know that you'll use them, however you want to --Anna Nalick\/Breathe(2AM) That's the thing about doing this. You can use my words however you want to. Possibly against\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Words"","block_context":{"text":"Words","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=7"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":3627,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=3627","url_meta":{"origin":6016,"position":3},"title":"You do what to your where?","author":"Michelle","date":"January 24, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Several of us had a very illuminating conversation about personal grooming the other day. There was comparing and contrasting of personal styles and preferences. Verbal comparing. We aren't that freaky! It ended with me worrying that I was not going to fit in with everyone else's grooming choices and would\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Words"","block_context":{"text":"Words","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=7"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":5191,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=5191","url_meta":{"origin":6016,"position":4},"title":"Too much of a good thing–moderate my what!?","author":"Michelle","date":"April 29, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"I never done good things I never done bad things I never did anything out of the blue, --David Bowie\/Ashes to Ashes I have great difficulty moderating my behavior. My temperament skews to extremes sometimes. I seem all bland on the outside, but on the inside I might be wondering\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Words"","block_context":{"text":"Words","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=7"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1293,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=1293","url_meta":{"origin":6016,"position":5},"title":"How much is too much?","author":"Michelle","date":"September 5, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u00a0 The moment that you feel, just possibly, you are walking down the street naked, exposing too much of your heart and your mind, and what exists on the inside, showing too much of yourself...That is the moment, you might be starting to get it right. --Neil Gaiman \u00a0 I\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Words"","block_context":{"text":"Words","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=7"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6016","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=6016"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6016\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/6027"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=6016"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=6016"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=6016"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}