You know, I am usually pretty stubborn. <\/p>\n
I’ve noticed. <\/p>\n
This might be a good time for me to give up though. <\/p>\n
Really?<\/p>\n
Really.<\/p>\n
Why?<\/p>\n
I am tired. <\/p>\n
You should be. <\/p>\n
I am. <\/p>\n
So you said. <\/p>\n
You don’t seem very surprised. <\/p>\n
I’m not…<\/p>\n
But?<\/p>\n
But I don’t know if I believe you. <\/p>\n
I don’t know if you should. <\/p>\n
You’re sort of fixated. <\/p>\n
I always have been. <\/p>\n
No, not always. <\/p>\n
Pretty much always. I just buried it for a few decades. <\/p>\n
Maybe that was for the best. <\/p>\n
No. It was definitely NOT for the best. It messed me up. <\/p>\n
You seem pretty together to me. I think you exaggerate how fucked up you are. <\/p>\n
That is a distinct possibility. <\/p>\n
You don’t want to admit that something about you is ordinary. <\/p>\n
Ordinary is a four letter word. <\/p>\n
Well, face it: this is a very ordinary issue. <\/p>\n
I suppose it is. <\/p>\n
To be clear, what specifically are you giving up?<\/p>\n
Trying to alter the course of things. <\/p>\n
Meaning?<\/p>\n
I am just going to let go. <\/p>\n
Meaning?<\/p>\n
I’m going to step back a little. <\/p>\n
Uh huh. <\/p>\n
What?<\/p>\n
No you aren’t.<\/p>\n
I didn’t say I was going to do anything drastic. Just let things take their course. <\/p>\n
That doesn’t even mean anything. <\/p>\n
It doesn’t?<\/p>\n
No. <\/p>\n
I think it means that I will stop trying to impose what I want on things. <\/p>\n
Why shouldn’t you get what you want?<\/p>\n
Maybe you can’t always get what you want. <\/p>\n
Don’t even quote the Rolling Stones to me. <\/p>\n
What? Why? But if you try sometimes…<\/p>\n
Shut up. <\/p>\n
But you do generally get what you need. <\/p>\n
No, you don’t need this. <\/p>\n
There isn’t any “this” to it. <\/p>\n
Exactly.<\/p>\n
All I am saying is that maybe now I am ready to not be so fixated and to just let whatever happens or doesn’t happen just…do that. <\/p>\n
If you say so. <\/p>\n
Your trust is heartwarming. <\/p>\n
When was the last middle of the night message?<\/p>\n
Oh, shut up. <\/p>\n
Just saying. <\/p>\n
So you don’t think I should let go?<\/p>\n
No, I do think you should. I just don’t think you will. For one thing, I don’t think you really even want to. <\/p>\n
Of course I don’t. <\/p>\n
So…why go through the motions?<\/p>\n
Because It’s just so stupid. <\/p>\n
Something has to change?<\/p>\n
I can only change my side of anything. <\/p>\n
That is very true. <\/p>\n
But you don’t think I will?<\/p>\n
I hope you will. <\/p>\n
It’s not like I want to. <\/p>\n
That is why it seems like a wasted effort. <\/p>\n
What do you think I should do?<\/p>\n
Nothing. Figure out why you are content to accept nothing. <\/p>\n
I’m not. I just…I don’t know what I should do other than try to just…back off. If I say something, I am being dramatic…if I don’t say anything, I am being dramatic. <\/p>\n
I’ll cross my fingers for you. It doesn’t seem like your options are good. <\/p>\n
No. I don’t want to close a door, but holding the door open by myself is getting old.<\/p>\n
You’ll figure it out. <\/p>\n
I guess. I did figure one thing out. <\/p>\n
What’s that?<\/p>\n
I will never get labia reduction surgery. <\/p>\n
Uh…okay. <\/p>\n
I can’t even believe it is a real thing. <\/p>\n
Oh, it is…<\/p>\n
What do you suppose would have to happen for a woman to be self conscious about her labia? I mean, I have never had anyone comment on mine at all. <\/p>\n
Me either. <\/p>\n
Do you suppose some women have better labia than others?<\/p>\n
I have no idea. Like you, no one has ever said anything about mine. <\/p>\n
No criticism. No compliments. <\/p>\n
Exactly. <\/p>\n
Well, I will let you know if I get any feedback about mine. If anyone ever sees them again. <\/p>\n
Thanks. And I promise I will never get mine altered. I would have to have way more extra money than I do for that to even make it onto a list of things to consider. <\/p>\n
Good to hear. I am sure yours are very lovely anyway. <\/p>\n
Yours, too.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"