{"id":9959,"date":"2015-05-14T05:00:53","date_gmt":"2015-05-14T12:00:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/michellejolin.com\/wordpress\/?p=9959"},"modified":"2015-05-17T20:11:47","modified_gmt":"2015-05-18T03:11:47","slug":"kissing-as-drapes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=9959","title":{"rendered":"Kissing as drapery"},"content":{"rendered":"

It’s easy to get enveloped. The kiss is like drawing the blinds.
\n–Anon<\/p>\n

The pull on my flesh was just too strong
\n<\/span>Stifled the choice and the air in my lungs
\n<\/span>–Mumford and Sons\/Broken Crown<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

The other night, I was chatting with someone online. The subject of sex came up, like it does, and we talked about getting carried away.  There are a lot of stories in my history about getting carried away, losing track of what I was doing and where. It goes way back.  Clothes get pushed aside or taken off. You find yourself doing things that you don’t think you would normally do in public.<\/p>\n

And it starts with kissing.<\/p>\n

It’s this alchemical reaction. Someone pushes your hair back, touches your neck. You like the way they smell. You like the way their skin feels. Then they kiss you. Sometimes, most of the time, almost always, that is all there is. Kissing. Regular kissing. It’s..nice. It’s…fine. It’s…enjoyable. Sometimes, though, it’s sparks and heat and the breath catches at the back of your throat. Maybe you remember saying something like “ohhh” and then there is a click. Your conscious brain shuts off and everything goes elemental.<\/p>\n

And it is all there is. Taste, touch, scent.<\/p>\n

Sensation. There’s a word to think about: sensational. Full of sensation. We don’t use it that way very often, but it’s perfect for the kind of kissing I am talking about.  Ever notice how close together your mouth, nose and ears are? It’s like all of the sensory organs are crammed together specifically to cause sensory overload during kissing of the sort that causes you to get carried away. So many sensations happening simultaneously that your brain turns off unnecessary distractions like modesty and judgement.<\/p>\n

Like pulling down the blinds. Suddenly it doesn’t matter if you’re in the front yard, at school, in a car. All that there is is sensation. Taste, touch, smell, sound. You stop noticing anything else. You don’t think, you just feel.<\/p>\n

Biological imperatives rule.<\/p>\n

And there is a sense that we tend not to use when we kiss..most of us kiss with our eyes closed. Like one more sense added would cause such an overload that everything would have to stop . Or maybe it’s just because our eyes are too close together to focus when we kiss.  Eyes closed, it’s like meditation, only instead of your own breath you hear his. His heartbeat. Fingers entwined in hair. Mouths, tongues and teeth. Hands on skin.<\/p>\n

It’s a good thing we’ve learned how to prevent reproduction, not that I will be able to do that for much longer. <\/span><\/p>\n

Kissing really doesn’t get enough credit when people talk about sex. For me, if the kissing doesn’t work nothing else will. Everything starts with the brain, and ends with kissing. If the kissing is right, usually everything else is too. If it isn’t it can be fixed. You can’t fix incompatible kissing. <\/span><\/p>\n

It always seemed like such a teenage thing, but I have never outgrown it. <\/span><\/p>\n


\n<\/span><\/p>\n

I hope I never do.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It’s easy to get enveloped. The kiss is like drawing the blinds. –Anon The pull on my flesh was just too strong Stifled the choice and the air in my lungs –Mumford and Sons\/Broken Crown The other night, I was chatting with someone online. The subject of sex came up, like it does, and we … Continue reading Kissing as drapery<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[20],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-9959","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-random-thoughts"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p7lr3R-2AD","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":8591,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=8591","url_meta":{"origin":9959,"position":0},"title":"Dreaming about Freudian slips","author":"Michelle","date":"December 14, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Eve had to ask, Eve had to ask What is wrong with this? Here is the place, now is the time Let's invent the kiss --Joan Osborne\/Lumina In the dream, I was at Rick and Chelle's. Everyone I knew was there. That is how I know it was really a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Words"","block_context":{"text":"Words","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=7"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2969,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=2969","url_meta":{"origin":9959,"position":1},"title":"Kissing a fool","author":"Michelle","date":"December 16, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"People You can never change the way they feel Better let them do just what they will For they will If you let them Steal your heart from you --George Michael\/Kissing A Fool There is a balance between making yourself vulnerable in a way that lets love into your life\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Words"","block_context":{"text":"Words","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=7"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":9332,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=9332","url_meta":{"origin":9959,"position":2},"title":"An imaginary conversation about first kisses","author":"Michelle","date":"February 20, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"My number one favorite thing to do is kissing. You mean sexually? No, all around. Huh. Yeah, I guess I would rank it pretty high myself. You have to have priorities. That is why I negotiated it into a date. What? Isn't kissing traditional in dating anyway? No, no. I\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Imaginary Conversation"","block_context":{"text":"Imaginary Conversation","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=18"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/01\/IMG_2470-0.jpg?fit=341%2C391&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":11280,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=11280","url_meta":{"origin":9959,"position":3},"title":"Is it a yes or a no?","author":"Michelle","date":"March 20, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"At happy hour the other night, one of the guys mentioned something that resonated with me.\u00a0 He was referring to a concept I'd read about several years ago and forgotten. He said that if someone can't say \"fuck yes,\" then it's a no. Later that night, I saw a post\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Random thoughts"","block_context":{"text":"Random thoughts","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=20"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":9234,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=9234","url_meta":{"origin":9959,"position":4},"title":"An imaginary conversation about kissing","author":"Michelle","date":"February 15, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Are you always this responsive? Mmm, what? Are you always this responsive. Physically. To a kiss? You stopped...why did you stop? Well, I was wondering... Less wondering. More kissing. But... No.. No? It's just for me? Yes. No. Not with everyone. More kissing. Happy Valentines Day!","rel":"","context":"In "Imaginary Conversation"","block_context":{"text":"Imaginary Conversation","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=18"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/IMG_2583.jpg?fit=768%2C576&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/IMG_2583.jpg?fit=768%2C576&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/IMG_2583.jpg?fit=768%2C576&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/michellejolin.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/IMG_2583.jpg?fit=768%2C576&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":9748,"url":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?p=9748","url_meta":{"origin":9959,"position":5},"title":"What is sexy","author":"Michelle","date":"April 13, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Sexy is an individual thing, clearly. \u00a0I'm not talking about things that are overtly sexual, although having a man's tongue in my mouth for the first time, or that first touch of skin on skin is incredibly sexy. \u00a0I'm talking about the stuff that is sensual, but not necessarily sexual.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Words"","block_context":{"text":"Words","link":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/?cat=7"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9959","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=9959"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9959\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=9959"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=9959"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michellejolin.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=9959"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}