Category: Words

This is the stupidest thing I have ever seen. Just stick a knife in my head.
–Rick

In life you try a lot of things out, if you’re a person who’s at all open to new experiences.

A lot of them are fun. Going up in a hot air balloon. Massages. Sensory deprivation tanks. Hockey games. Spin classes. Riding a motorcycle. Going to Burning Man. Printmaking classes. Ice skating. Belly dancing. learning a new language.

Some are not fun, exactly, but are a challenge worth finishing. Training for and running a half marathon. Painting the exterior of a house. Planting a vegetable garden. Getting a certification for something at work.

Some are not fun at all. Drinking yerba mate. Being on fire. Trying certain types of sushi. Drinking so much you end up with a night full of spinning rooms and then a hangover.

Other new things are…fine…
You wouldn’t necessarily do them again, but they were worth a shot. The roller derby was like that for me. There were a lot of things to like. The nick names like Minstrel Psycho, Screaming Beaver, French Tickler and Irie Belle. The cheesy announcing. The way the audience dresses. Women shoving each other around. The tattoos. I got to wear the kind of clothes I really like to wear. It was fun..enough. Probably not fun enough to do regularly. We probably had more fun Facebooking roller derby than actually being there.

Facebook Roller Derby would be a good title for something…

Anyway, somehow we always manage to have at least a little fun. My friends all have a gift for it. Even just hanging out around the house is fun with them. Improvising karaoke, playing Mexican Train, talking about who Rocky got such a big hickey from that a teacher said he couldn’t go to a friend’s graduation. Dumb things. We all laugh easily.

The older I get, the more I recognize how important that is.

Eve had to ask, Eve had to ask
What is wrong with this?
Here is the place, now is the time
Let’s invent the kiss
–Joan Osborne/Lumina

In the dream, I was at Rick and Chelle’s. Everyone I knew was there. That is how I know it was really a dream–there were people there who would never be there in real life. People who don’t know Rick and Chelle. People I haven’t seen in a long time. People I wish I could see but can’t. Everyone I love.

There was a party going on, and we were all in the basement. That is also something that doesn’t happen very often in real life. The party is always upstairs.

It was New Years Eve. Everyone was drinking champagne. Paddy was playing his ukulele on the back deck, and I was singing along and taking puffs of his cigarette as he played a song by the Cure.

We kept singing and playing as we walked back inside. As I walked and sang, I started kissing everyone. Some people got hugs. Some people got more than one kiss. Some of them seemed a little surprised to be getting kissed. Most of them got kissed on the cheek. A few got kissed on the lips. Some of the perfectly scruffy ones even got a bit nuzzled around the neck area.

Paddy followed me around the room, strumming, while I sang
“show me how you do that trick….”
kiss…
“the one that makes me scream, she said…”
kiss…
“the one that makes me laugh, she said…”
kiss…
“and threw her arms around my neck…”
hug..
“show me how you do it…”
slightly more lingering kiss..
“I promise you, I promise that I’ll run away with you…”
another…
“I’ll run away with you..”

And I sang and kissed my way around the room until my glass was empty and I’d kissed all of the people I love. In the end, I was crying happy tears and the clock ticked down to midnight just as I sang
“You…
Just like Heaven.”

Usually I don’t feel a need to analyze my dreams, particularly if they are enjoyable. I like singing. I love kissing. I’ve missed both. I’ve been doing a lot of singing lately, but there has been no kissing in far too long.

Apparently I miss kissing enough that it’s invading my dreams.

It’s better than no kissing at all.