So you have a second date with that guy? That’s cool!
Yeah, I’m looking forward to it.
What are you going to do?
We’re going to have lunch and drinks, and then hang out at my place.
No. Bad idea.
Yes. Good idea.
Are you nuts?
Yes, but it has nothing to do with inviting someone over
What if he’s an axe murderer?
If you saw how skinny he is, you wouldn’t be so worried.
It has nothing to do with size.
Really? I thought size was important…
It’s not funny! I don’t want you do do this! You can’t just trust someone you have only met one time.
How many times do I have to meet someone before I can trust them? Would he be more trustworthy after 5 dates?
You are avoiding the point on purpose. It would be safer to meet in a public place.
We did. And I ascertained that he isn’t likely to be a psycho…and that I can physically kick his ass if I need to.
What are you going to do that you can’t do in public anyway?
Do you really want me to answer that?
Yeah. What is it you want to do that you can’t do in a pub or at the movies?
Suck his cock. They get really mad if I do that in the pub. I checked.
Be serious!
You don’t think I should suck his cock at the pub, do you?
What is wrong with you?
Oh, a lot of stuff. So, you disagree that it would be better if I took him to my place to suck his cock?
Oh my God. You have lost your mind!
NO.
You’re probably right.
Thank you. I can’t believe you were even considering it.
I should really just fuck him instead. If I suck his cock first, he might not be able to follow through on all of our planned activities.
You’re killing me.
What? It’s true.
Can’t you just tell me to mind my own business like a normal person?
Apparently not.
OK OK. I have learned my lesson. But you’re kidding about this, right?
Seriously?
Yes.
I think you need to review that lesson you said you just learned.
Come on–just tell me!
What part? The part about fucking?
Did I mention that I asked him to bring a friend? You can come over and watch if you are worried about my safety. I’ll have to ask him how he feels about that, he might not be into voyeurs…
Do not do this. Do not.
What was that about minding your own business?
I will, I promise. I learned my lesson. This time I really mean it.
Good.
But you’re kidding about the friend, right?
Good night, Nosey Nellie.
Kidding?
Hanging up now.
Good night.
So, did you want me to text you when he leaves and let you know how big his dick is?
Oh my God! Stop!
I can’t help it now.
No. No more details. No matter what I ask you.
Deal. Wait, do you think I should ask him to shave his balls before he comes over?
Stop! Stop!
Sweet dreams…
I’ll never sleep again.
Thanks for being worried though. Really.